A Guide to Long Distance Friendship

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As the school year approaches, it's likely that many of your friends will move to a different college than you, and both your and your friends' lives will start to look drastically different. The dreaded long distance friendship has caused many a once 'best friends for life's to drift away, with both content to carry on without the other. If reading that causes a face to flash in your mind and a stubborn defiance to take root, declaring, "No. Never. Not our friendship," then this is the blog for you. Here are some things to consider when you and your best friend have to go long distance. 

1. You may not talk as often as you once did. 

I won't sugarcoat this. It's pretty common that even the best of friends don't talk every day like they did when they were in high school. Classes, homework, school events, service days, concerts, etc. begin to pile up, and before you know it, it's been a week since you've had a conversation with your friend living elsewhere. 

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2. Just because the quantity of your time decreases doesn't mean the quality will. 

As I'm writing this, one my best friends in the entire world is sitting beside me, and this moment is so special because we see each other about once a year. We became friends in kindergarten and never looked back. The beauty of the moment also lies in the fact that we are both in our Senior years at different college and still consider each other the best of best friends. Some of our most treasured memories come from after we graduated high school during some of our short but quality visits. 

3. Your friend will make other friends. 

It stings to see your best friend having fun with people you don't even know, but remember, you want your friend to be happy and loved by other people. They deserve that. Also, keep in mind this quotation by Theodore Roosevelt, "Comparison is the thief of joy." Don't compare your BFF's new friends to yourself. It won't end well. 

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4. You will also make friends. 

And this is where it's worth mentioning that the same Teddy Roosevelt quotation applies. Your old friends and your new friends are not the same people. Your friendships are in different stages and different forms at this point. Your high school BFF may not be able to attend your performance in the musical, and your new BFF may not understand all your quirks, so communication may not be as great. So, don't compare them. It's not fair to you or your friends. 

5. Both of you will change. 

Changes in personality and interests seems to be the main factors that cause friends to drift apart. You may major in different subjects, join different clubs, and develop a love of different foods. Suddenly, you don't have as much in common as you previously did. The key to navigating this is remaining interested in learning about the other one's life. Who knows? Maybe you'll pick up some of your friend's new interests, as well. 

4.  Set aside time to be a good friend. 

As your friendship progresses, it can be hard to maintain being a good friend. Make sure you take the time to be the friend your long-distance friend deserves. Send the a birthday card. Take the time to check on how they are doing spiritually and emotionally. Just because you guys are miles apart doesn't mean you can't be a source of support for each other. 

5. Use technology. 

Luckily, we no longer live in the 19th century, so carrier pigeons are a thing of the past. Instead, we have some pretty nifty technology like messages we can type with our thumbs that are transported almost instantaneously to the recipient and programs that allow us to talk and see people through a screen. Just remember: your friend is only a text away. 

6. Go visit each other. 

There's nothing cooler than seeing your friend's new home. Over breaks, don't be afraid to go visit one another. Your friend will know all the cool things to do and yummy places to eat. Also, this is a great way to make new memories with each other. 

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Nolie, the long distance friend

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